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Dealing with Fear and Loneliness Associated with the Holidays

Christmas and the holidays for many, are the best time of year. It is a joy to be with family and friends, to participate in celebrations and to soak in the whole festive experience.

Others experience a sensation of loneliness, even when they are with people. This feeling can be a vague sensation or a strong emotion. On a logical level, it makes no sense. However, we do not live purely by logic. We have the gift of emotion and at times, they can be challenging. 

Some people attempt to shut off the loneliness emotion (or other feelings). They numb themselves with food for example. Others engage in strange behaviors. Still others become outright hostile, even to those they love. 

Welcome to fear, the underlying cause of all of the above. Fear is at the core of all of these (and much more). Fear weakens the Kidney energy and causes one of 3 reactions:

  • a low, depressed feeling
  • a numbing sensation
  • an aggressive, anger-based reaction
Each is an avoidance of feeling fear. Loneliness is the fear of experience one’s life by themselves and thus, a lack of deep, interpersonal moments we need. Anger is the more aggressive reaction to fear. “I will fight it off” so to speak. . . . Each may be understandable, but neither is effective long term. Loneliness leads to depression. Anger and numbness lead to disease.

There is an herb called Bupleurum, which allows us to express ourselves, including our fears. It moves the energy, including the emotions. It is often a deeply cathartic experience. We find the root causes of our fears and learn to either deal with them, or find the courage to seek some help. Either way, it life gets better.

Don’t let fear take over. Every person has so many beautiful qualities and gifts they can share with others and with the world, or at least their world. Find the courage to become that person. Find the hero inside — the one that takes on fear and conquerors it, or makes peace with it. 

What a gift that would be for all involved.

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